Divorce is one of the most stressful experiences that any of us might go through in a lifetime. Ironically, in the midst of this, divorcing couples have to make critical decisions about living arrangements, moving out, parenting, finances, property, debt, and so on—decisions that will impact their lives and the lives of their children for a long time to come.
Transforming Conflict provides divorce mediation and Collaborative Divorce legal services to help couples make agreements about how to structure their future lives in two separate households without going to court. Both processes are designed to minimize the hostility and misunderstandings that couples tend to experience when ending a marriage or other committed relationship. When there are minor or dependent children, divorce mediation and Collaborative Divorce will support you in building a foundation for a healthy co-parenting relationship. Each process also gives divorcing and separating couples a sense of control at a time when they are feeling great anxiety and disorientation and diffuses their fears by creating a non-threatening structure for making important decisions about their future separate lives.
How It Works
Mediation minimizes the hostility and misunderstandings that couples experience when ending a marriage or other committed relationship. When there are minor or dependent children, divorce mediation can help build a foundation for a healthy co-parenting relationship.
Divorce mediation also gives separating couples a sense of control at a time when they are feeling great anxiety and disorientation. It diffuses their fears by creating a non-threatening structure for making important decisions about their future separate lives.
The initial mediation sessions for divorce or relationship dissolution provide an opportunity for couples to address short-term issues that, left unresolved, merely add to their stress. Deciding how they will share common space, arrange parenting schedules, manage finances, and transition to separate households gives them a deeper sense of security so that they can focus, with less anxiety, on the major tasks related to their uncoupling.
What to Expect
In a series of two-hour mediation sessions, divorcing and separating couples are guided through conversations and assignments about:
- Post-divorce or post-separation living expenses;
- Disposition of the family residence;
- Dividing community assets;
- Allocating responsibility for community debts; and
- Determining spousal maintenance.
Additionally, if there are minor children from the relationship, the parents will need to:
- Establish the amount of child support; and
- Create a parenting plan.
Transforming Conflict also offers services to help families address post-divorce issues, thereby ensuring smoother transitions and stronger co-parenting relationships.
As the circumstances of parents and children change after a divorce, the parties may need to revisit their parenting agreements or arrangements for child support or maintenance. These circumstances may include a change in a parent’s employment and earning power, a transition from stay-at-home parent to full-time employment, and the changing needs of children.
Parents have an opportunity to express their feelings and concerns about a proposed move as they work out ways to mitigate the child’s loss of contact with his or her parent.
Other post-divorce issues
Sessions can include discussions about such issues as differences in child-rearing practices; competing needs for boundaries; concern about the other parent’s new partner; and the difficulties of adjusting to being part of a new blended “step”-family.